Edward Cullen and his bitch went to the movie theaters one day to catch a flick. He ate her with some popcorn on the side. And no one noticed because he licked all the blood off the floor.
Enter girl in silk shirt with skulls on it, flower pants that are cuffed at the bottom, velvet red shoes, and a black beanie. She has a perfect mole on the side of her mouth and a very straight nose that is almost horse-like, but not quite. She is pale like a vampire, but she is not a vampire.
She walks up to skinny girl who used to be fat. She kind of looks like a frog, eyes spread wide apart, nose thin and crooked, bones sticking out of her shoulders. Not literally sticking out, but like poking through the skin a bit. “Hi munchky! Che taaaaall?” “I just really don’t want to go and talk today. I’m tired, do you think I can skip seeing George today?” Loud enough for the whole room to hear. She’s talking about her therapist. Obviously. “I donno lovey, but I saw mine and it was really great. Uhhh she’s so great.” You already said that. Vampire girl sulks. She puts on her headphones and listens to whatever shitty music she listens too. She sits there for an hour and doesn’t go to George. She’s a real bitch, and when you make eye contact with her she never smiles back. Instead she just orders her half caf, vanilla latte with almond milk. She sips it slowly, I imagine it burning her whole entire throat. “It’s spelled Chamanda. C-H-A-M-A-N-D-A.”
“Chamanda?” “Yes, that’s my name.” I like the smell of your morning breath, even though it sometimes smells like a barnyard. That thing you do when you pretend you’re a cat. And when you pick me up and let me hang down your back, my stomach resting on your shoulders. My insides get squished a little every time, but I don’t really care. You’re really weird and you don’t always get things. And you can’t pay attention for more than ten seconds if there is something else going on. And you care too much about what other people think of you. Which makes me want to scream. Because so and so doesn’t notice if you’re not around, in fact they’re never going to notice because no one cares except for me. Sad to say. But pretend away that I’m not your only friend. Because we’ll spoon tonight, and you’ll lisp with your mouth guard in, and you’re breath will smell like shit in the morning but I don’t care. Because I like the smell of your morning breath, even though it sometimes smells like a barnyard. And it’s warm.
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